SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED

And it's rinsed me of money I don't even have in the first place.

For the cost of this, I could've got:

Or a flight to New York. Check your tax disc people.

Cape Back Dress - £80

Boyfriend Tweed Blazer - £70

Argyle Ankle Boots - £65

Earrings - £10

All Topshop

TAKE ME OUT

Ok, so I know I'm a little late off the mark with this one but I had totally forgotten how much I want to see this exhibition at the V&A. How could one forego an extensive delve into the wardrobe, and subsequently life, of one of the most beautiful and enigmatic icons of our time, Grace Kelly. It's a shame that she is often forgotten in the Audrey vs. Marilyn debate, as to me she encompasses all that both embody separately: Maz's blonde 'BAM' factor teamed with Aud's elegant air.

Look how divine she is here with 'ol Blue Eyes? That's the kind of dress to make you weep into a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc when it doesn't fit you anymore.

She was even a proper, bonafide Princess for crying out loud. Long and short of it - I want to go, I have no money, someone take me please. Thanks.

STUFF IT...

...Aubergines that is. The wonderfully fleshy vegetable's are 40p at the minute in Lidl, so, having watched my veggie mummy eat this dish for years, I thought I'd give it a go. 

Kitchen labour was minimal, ingredients were cheap and it leaves you very full. The recipe I followed called for chilli and curry powder, but being the spicy-phobe that I am, I left these out.

Ingredients:

1 aubergine

100g cous cous

1 cinnamon stick

1 shallot (diced)

1 clove garlic (diced)

1 tsp ginger

2 tomatoes (finely chopped)

150ml vegetable stock

olive oil

parmesan

Preheat oven to 200C/400F/Gas 6.

Roast the aubergine in a griddle pan on all sides until cooked through.

Cut in half, spoon out the flesh and reserve.

Prepare the couscous by placing the cinnamon stick, garlic, shallot, ginger and diced tomato in an oven-proof dish with the couscous and vegetable stock. Cover and cook in the oven for 4 minutes.

Spoon the aubergine flesh back into the shells and top with the couscous mixture. Drizzle with olive oil and grate over parmesan.

Finally cook in the oven for around 10 minutes, then place under the grill for 5 minutes and serve with salad of your choice - I chose rocket with classic vinaigrette dressing.

ENVY

My flatmate Kate got this bloody gorge jumper today. JALOUSE is an understatement. £55 is out me budget though. If you have that kind of wonga, go forth and purchase, this will literally go with anything; dresses, leggings, shorts etc etc. This is what I'd team it with - theoretically like.

Jumper £55, Jeans £35, Wedges £135 all:

 

HAUTE CUISINE

Continuing on from the previous post on my joblessness, here is how I get my (very) cheap thrills on a Bank Holiday Weekend. It's probs rather obvious that I unashamedly lick the very ground that Sophie Dahl walks on, so her food programme flies high on my excitability radar. Cooking, I have found, is a stupidly satisfying activity when you're not really sure what to do with yourself, and last night I tackled my first 'off the telly' recipe. 

Roasted Tomato and Thyme (and basil) Soup with Double Baked (blue) Cheese and Chive Potatoes

Ingredients

For the potatoes

4 baking potatoes

knob of butter

2 tbsp crème fraîche

small bunch fresh chives, finely chopped

200g/7oz soft blue goats' cheese

1 free-range egg, beaten

sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

For the soup

2kg/4½lbs large ripe plum tomatoes, halved

1 garlic bulb, cut in half horizontally

2 large red onions, peeled, quartered

few sprigs fresh thyme

1 tbsp golden caster sugar

sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil

250ml/9fl oz vegetable stock (optional)

100ml/3½fl oz single cream (optional)

a few drops Worcestershire sauce (optional)

a few drops balsamic vinegar (optional)

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 190C/375F/Gas 5.

2. Bake the potatoes directly on the wire rack of the oven for 1½ - 1¾ hours, or until tender.

3. Meanwhile, for the soup, place the tomatoes, garlic, onions and thyme into a large roasting tin and season, to taste, with salt and freshly ground black pepper. Drizzle with the oil, and roast in the oven for 40-50 minutes. Remove from the oven and set aside to cool slightly.

4. Mash the garlic with the back of a fork, and discard the skin. Tip the roasted tomatoes and onions into a food processor along with the mashed garlic,

and pulse until smooth.

5. If the soup is too thick, pour into a large saucepan and loosen the mixture with either vegetable stock, or single cream. Add a little Worcestershire sauce or balsamic vinegar, to season, if you like.

6. Remove the potatoes from the oven and using a cloth to hold the hot potato, cut each one in half and scoop out the insides into a bowl.

7. Mix in the butter, crème fraîche, chives and goats' cheese, and stir in the egg.

8. Season, to taste, with salt and freshly ground black pepper, and spoon the potato mixture back into the skins. Place onto a baking tray in the oven for

a further 15-20 minutes, or until golden-brown and crisp on top.

9. To serve, reheat the soup and divide among four bowls, with two potato halves each on the side.

I found the whole process incredibly easy, and that's not bigging myself up as I'm really quite stupid. Best bit: roughly chopping the tomatoes, onion and garlic and getting it all oily and salty with my hands - tres Nigella. Worst Bit: liquifying the soup with a hand held blender, got a tiny bit splattered... But it tasted nice, faffing about with presentation added a fastidious bonus and I'd deffo do it again.

YOUNG WOES

So, still surfing the wave of unemployment, I have written more Cover Letters in the past 9 months than The Olsen's combined have had hot dinners. Not hard really. But after a while, the constant rejection gears up from a feeling of a mild annoyance to a hefty kick in the groin. The reason I digress is, I am in the middle of applying for a job at a Teen Magazine. Yet another added bonus of my chosen profession is that there is no simple application form, tick box, AB or C option - pretty much every position advertised requires at least three feature ideas and about 300 words in the 'house style'. This particular role demands five feature propositions as well as a diary or blog entry in the prose of a 'typical teenager'. Right. 

Already being deemed geriatric by my 18 year old sister, this could prove harder than thought. Luckily, I still have an old diary from the height of my own adolescent angst to refer to; and when reading it the first thought to enter my head - what a fucking idiot. There is no way that I could use any of that whinging crap, riddled with abominable spelling and toe-curlingly awful slang. It is interesting though, how one tends to view their formative years from such a rose-tinted perspective, when in reality, we (or maybe just I) were as rattlingly insecure as Woody Allen on acid.

For example, then, I had my whole life ahead of me, good skin, and never had to consider stale pans in the sink, overdue laundry or managing a weekly shop with £8. Whereas now, I'm a solid government statistic, poor and not really sure what I'm doing from day to day, yet I'm far happier. It's a rare thing to be grateful of age, but in this case I so am. Having said that, I'll probably read this in five years time and want to break my own fingers so I can never write such bollocks again.

SAVE OUR SOLES

So I am currently the poorest I've ever been in my life, a good thing one would think, that the sun has finally put his Philip Treacy hat on. Free activities such as park loitering, just walking around and generally sitting become very enjoyable. However, in a true case of Sods Law, my only sandals are fecked.  The soles have come away so I'm flapping down the street like the woman that feeds the birds in Mary Poppins. If I had some money to buy new footwear here is a selection that have taken my fancy, maybe if I go into the bank barefoot they'll give me a loan for £35?

All available from:

IF MONEY WERE NO OBJECT

I'd be all over this, like flies on you know what.

Perfect, don't you think, for one of these:

With this man:

Beaded Silk-Chiffon Kaftan, £1,265 by Issa at Net-A-Porter.

ALRIGHT A FEW BAD THINGS...

... But I have a job interview coming up so it's fine.

Addison Boot - Topshop

I DID A BAD THING -

- but it's so totally worth it.

Julie Verhoeven for Mulberry dress - reduced. ALOT.

P.S. I first saw this dress back in October 07 in the Bond Street store for a cool grand and pretty much died. I then saw it once in the factory store in Somerset last winter but at half the price there was no way I could afford it. Then... last summer I tried tracking it down for this Vogue lunch I had and despite calling every single shop in the country and scouring eBay, no luck. Today, in the Somerset store again, there it was, hidden at the back and I swear I nearly had to change my pants. I can deal with being poor as long as I'm wearing this to rummage the bins.

RUMMAGE REWARDS

So I've never really been one for sorting through piles of stuff to find that "hidden gem" that you can boast about to all and sundry for years to come. I hate T.K.Maxx with a slight passion, I think maybe all the shit shoes and fluorescent lighting cause my hackles to rise. Anyway, about a month ago, something momentous happened. Something that can only happen once. An experience that can either go really well or be toe-curlingly awkward and you can't wait till it's over with. I lost my virginity. My car boot virginity that is. And the old adage is true, when the first time's good, it leaves you hungry for more. Religious attendance every week has thus far secured me:

4 ornate side plates (£2)

1 brass swallow (£3)

1 pair of M People style earrings (£1)

1 large washed out and buffed gold leaf and floral vase (£2)

1 pair of leather studded cat ears (£1)

1 large gold "C" on a chain (£1)

And this week, today to be precise, I have secured what I can only be the bargain of my life.*

A GENUINE PPQ COAT FROM THE AW07 COLLECTION COMPLETE WITH PACK OF AMERICAN MARLBORO LIGHTS IN THE POCKET FOR £15.

Just to reiterate... FIFTEEN POUNDS.

Here's a picture so you can see what I'm gloating about. I'm sorry, I know, I know I sound just like all the other scavvy shopping dicks - but I simply cannot help it. I've opened the Pandora's Box of self-satisfied smugness, and boy am I basking in it.

*Apart from the Buffalo boots I got when I was eleven, reduced from £150 to £19 - they were a size four, I was a size seven. I wore them everyday till I finally hit the size eight milestone and they made my toes bleed.

I REALLY BLOODY WANT THIS

But at £550 it's approximately 11 times more than I could scrape together right now...

Mulberry Daria Satchel available at www.mulberry.com

Accident waiting to happen.

I got these boots today as I've wanted some for ages, however as much as I love them I think they would be an actual disaster to walk in anywhere other than the flat. If I drank in them I would definitely break something hence I'm afraid I can't afford the £80 to just have to look at them then put on something more sensible. I simply must take them back before we bond even further.